This "Season" is O-V-E-R !!!

Tonight, at a nearby non-profit youth sports office, a very significant event will occur. A new Executive Committee will be elected for our local youth soccer organization, EDYSL. It is significant because for the past 3 years, Kirk has been helping to run this organization as first, a Vice-President, and more recently, the President. Tonight, a new Vice-President and Treasurer will be elected and TOMORROW they will be able to appoint a new President. It is been an interesting experience to say the very least. Right now, I am breathing a HUGE sigh of relief. No more phone calls that never stop, no more nasty emails, no more heartbreaking emails, no more trying to figure out WHO is posturing for WHAT.

They say there are different "seasons" of life. Overall it was a good "season" of volunteering. In the spirit of Thanksgiving, here's some things we hope we accomplished and are thankful for experiencing:

• We made MANY new friends in our town. It is refreshing to see how many wonderful, GOOD people are in our community. We hope we represented what a good "mormon" family should be like!
• Kirk was able to use many of his talents to rewrite by-laws, restructure the organization, and put some order in a board of volunteers. He oversaw the budget with integrity and tried to emphasize the importance of stewardship to the overall membership.
• We were able to be personally involved with our children's coaches.
• We were able to get other high quality individuals involved which elevated the quality of the entire league.
• Kirk was able to hire a professional development director to provide some level of unbiased decision-making.

And last, but not least, we are thankful for the opportunity to give of our time and talents and to witness so many others who have done the same. We realized that good people NEED to step up and MAKE time to participate in their community. And while this "season" is over for right now, I have no doubt it will come again just as sure as Spring follows Winter!

Last year, literally in the middle of the "season." Our EDYSL kids!

(HATE this picture of me, I look frazzled, which actually is an accurate portrayal of me during "the season")

The Cult of FOOTBALL

If you know our family at all, you know that soccer has pretty much ruled our lives for the past few years. This year, however, something changed. True, two children were still playing the sport. But, Cole, my 12-year old, chose a slightly different path. He wanted to spread his wings. Try something new. Expand his horizons.

He wanted to play football.

It's been a very eye-opening experience for me, as a mom. Because, you see, you don't just "play football." Football isn't something you just dabble in for a few hours a week.

When football season begins, the football player's entire existence suddenly revolves around the sport. And, there's something else that happened in our house. Strange and different behavior from Kirk, the Dad of the football player. Which got me to thinking...it sounded familiar. This excessively zealous and unquestioning commitment to something.

The infusion of new ideology, beliefs, and practices into our household...A CULT. That's it! Football is a cult, and right under my nose, the brainwashing had begun.

A previously initiated cult member actively recruiting.

You can't just claim something is a cult without proof. Social scientists differ in what they consider a cult and what is not. But there are some general characteristics that are common between cults. Here is my humble analysis of why I believe football is a cult, based on my first-hand observations during the past couple of months.

#1: Football practices start out with "conditioning." Two hours everyday for 4 weeks. Boys are frequently seen throwing up on the sidelines while their dads proudly look on. They will say it's a "right of passage." Practice days may change at the last minute and there are no excuses for missing any part of it. Cult characteristic: Members of cults are expected to devote disproportionate amounts of time to the group and group-related activities. Debilitating work routines are used in excess.

#2: The "coach" becomes a supreme being. Parents are not allowed to question coach decisions. If the coach says the ankle's fine, the pain must be ignored, and play resumes. The coach is free to scream, curse, and demand excessive amounts of physical tasks. Cult characteristic: The leader is not accountable to any authorities AND induces feelings of shame and/or guilt in order to influence and/or control members.

#3: Certain players, not wishing to play in their older age bracket, limit their weight gain throughout the season so as to stay within the league-mandated weight limits. This is done by their parents withholding pre-game meals 24 hours before weigh-in time. Cult characteristic: The group teaches or implies that its supposedly exalted ends justify whatever means it deems necessary. This may result in members' participating in behavior that they would have considered reprehensible or unethical before.

#4: Church activities must now be scheduled around football games and practices. Because church leaders' sons play football this is acceptable. Unfortunately, it is not acceptable for those leaders whose sons do not play football. Cult characteristic: The group is elitist, claiming a special, exalted status for itself, it's leader and members. The group has a polarized us-verses-them mentality, which may cause conflict with the wider society.

#5: Dad suddenly is home from work at 5:30 p.m. everyday there is football practice. Dad searches sporting good store for high tech football appareal. Attention to detail becomes high priority. Great effort is put into assessing proper fit of all LAYERS of football attire. Cult characteristic: Members become obsessive about group activities and anticipate being together. Leaders prescribe what types of clothes to wear. Members are expected to devote inordinate amounts of money to further the cause of the group.

Perhaps I am over-reacting just a tad. I guess I could be jumping to conclusions. After all, football is over now, and things seem to be back to normal. If it's not a CULT, then I have one more theory...it's genetic. A genetic disposition from one or more parents. If there is such a thing as a "football gene" we all know where Cole could have gotten such a thing....

Poor Evan, is there any way to escape his genetic destiny? I think not. Let the brainwashing begin!

Premonitions

Here's a picture of Lauren and Claire having fun at Grandma's in Arizona. They are beautiful on the outside (granted, I'm biased), but my goal, as their mother, is to enhance the beauty on the inside and attempt to keep it from being contaminated by the "world."

I had a dream last night. It involved Claire being trapped in a glass office-type building. Something bad was trying to get her (this might have something to do with a recent viewing of Poltergeist). I was trying to rescue her but was unsuccessful. I woke myself up so as to stop the dream.

Today, I took Lauren to the doctor's office for her yearly check-up. For a portion of the appointment, the doctor asked me to leave so she could examine Lauren. I knew Lauren wouldn't really have wanted me in, so I stepped out. While I was out of the room, the young doctor (And I mean young) proceeded to ask Lauren questions about her sexual activity, what she knew about sex, HIV, and alcohol and drugs. I could hear what was being said from where I was and I intently listened to Lauren's answers. Lauren did a great job explaining to the doctor her standards and decisions she has made regarding these issues. I was very proud of her.

BUT...(and this is where I switch into my "I am woman, hear me ROAR" persona) why did this doctor feel she had the right, without parental permission, to ask my daughter these questions? I am so upset about this. There was a natural assumption that it was her duty as a doctor to probe into my daughter's morality AND that her duty to do this TRUMPED my parental rights? I have run into this attitude with teachers and administrators in the public schools (which would require an entirely different entry and include the words Planned Parenthood and condom demonstration), but was surprised that a privately run doctor's office would also employ these tactics. It is discouraging.

I understand why they feel the need. I know many parents these days are disengaged. I know many parents engage in risky behavior themselves. I shudder to think of the number of 15-year-olds at her high school that are sexually active. But, at the very least, shouldn't a doctor attempt to have a conversation with the parent to discern the necessity for such personally intrusive information? Can't there be more respect and credence given for our Christian lifestyle?

And so, can anyone tell me where there is a rock that I can take my family and crawl under? Because, right now, I want to preserve what purity and beauty that is there. Just like my dream last night, I'm trying to rescue them from the glass office building with the "poltergeists" that are chasing them around. Except, I want a better ending than my nightmare had. In fact, I EXPECT a better ending. And, I guess if I push aside my frustrations and turn to my Heavenly Father, I know I am not the only one determined to help my beautiful daughters turn into the incredible women they are meant to be.

Halloween 2008

It was a quiet Halloween this year. Only 2 costumes to worry about and 2 pumpkins to carve. Evan was a werewolf and Claire was a "fashion designer." At least that was the story. I think she just wanted the outfit! Lauren and Cole were off at parties with their friends. Evan was in charge of decorating the front porch and took his job very seriously. We had spider webs with spiders, skeletons, and a fog machine. It was a great way to welcome in the fall season and we are all excited for the holiday season (that's my story and I'm sticking to it)!

Lauren's Dream!

Lauren has always loved to read and has many favorite books. This is one of Lauren's favorites--about one of Lauren's idols--Mia Hamm. Lauren has read this book many times over...

In fact, she has highlighted parts of it and sectioned it off with post-it notes.

I have always admired the way Lauren works at things. She figures out what she wants to accomplish and then makes a plan. I know it would be a dream come true for her to someday meet Mia Hamm. In the meantime, she's working on another dream...

Lauren spends countless hours in the backyard practicing. She can juggle the soccer ball well over 100 times without stopping. Lauren would love to play soccer in college. She would especially love to play for BYU! Last month the BYU Women's Team came to the Bay Area to play UC Berkeley. We took the kids out of school early and made the trip. There were actually a lot of Cougar fans in the stand and even one lady who insisted on singing the Cougar Fight Song (solo) at the end of the game. If I could have gotten a picture of Cole staring at her it would have been priceless. Here's a few pictures from the game.

We had a great time, but more importantly, Lauren got a vision of where she wants to go. Good luck with your dream, Lauren--we're all rooting for you!